Powerful And Unpolished

Welcome back everyone. This is Tim from Powerful and Unpolished. I am here with a, just a divine guest that I am excited to have here. Um, this is my first time interviewing Missy. Missy Hackman is with Board and Brush Creative Studios, and I asked her if she would join us today. Actually asked her if she'd join us last week and we had a major electrical out outage, so we revamped it today.

Thank you for joining us, Missy. Sure thing. I love it. Yes. Um, for those of you, we, uh, we've been hit or miss through the holiday season with, uh, the power being out and all the different holidays. So this is another, uh, episode that we get to jump in and get a little business with a spice of life or a little life with, uh, spice business, you know?

I like it. So we're gonna explore with Missy here and Missy. Just to get everyone kind of on the same page, what are you current, your, your current business right now? You're, you're a small business owner. What's your current business right now that you're doing? I am a small business owner of a DIY studio in Parker, Colorado, and it is a, it's raw wood with, um, distressing and stencils and stain and paint and little buildings sometimes.

And so everybody goes home with a gorgeous project that they think they could not do because everyone comes in and says, I'm not very creative, or I'm not very artsy, and they come out. When they're finished, they're like, oh, wow. I did this. It looks like it could be in a store. So it's fun to see the, the, from the beginning to the end and that it's finished the day they go home, they take it that day.

And so it's some often can be heirloom products that they make, that they're gonna keep forever. That, uh, a stocking holder is big this time of year and with family names on it and coat racks. Signs with established when they were married for, you know, it's, it's just a fun, fun place to build and create and spend time with friends, family, and we have a great time.

Nice. We just won't, yeah, about three years. So what are you, or three years on Sunday? Three years. Congratulations. Three years on Sunday. Yes. It was fun. We celebrated on Sunday with some giveaways and some fun things, so that was fun. Well, and you had just shared with me that this is kind of a big. Big peak of your season right now, right?

The holidays are right before the holidays. Oh, it's absolutely kind of, kind of starts a little in October, but then November and December are. So busy with people coming and wanting to do, uh, things with family and friends from out of town or, uh, we do corporate parties and so we get a lot of groups in that are not there.

Normally during the year, we have a lot of re uh, repeat customers and we have a lot of, uh, VIPs, we call them. Very important painters. Oh, nice. Rather than people. Yes. So we see a lot of the same people, but this time of the year we're getting all kinds of, of groups that just, it is very busy. We finished on Sunday with two classes, and now we have a few days off and it'll, it'll still be busy next week, then it'll kinda even out a little bit.

So it, it's creative chaos. Nice. Yeah. What is it? Uh, even in chaos, there's order. There is. Yeah. I mean, there's a plan all the way through it, but sometimes it feels, you know, like when it's busy in there, it feels like, wow, this is, some people might feel like it, it's a crazy place. Everybody's going back and forth to paint and moving around the studio and having a glass of wine and, oh, nice.

Yeah. Yeah, it's, it's a sip and paint kind of place. Okay. So it's kind of nice for that too. So what do you notice? I mean, this is, um. So I get that's the doing of the business. And now let's start playing with the stuff that I like. 'cause, 'cause you know, this podcast and our company and insights for choice is really just about opening up to possibility, opening up to stronger clarity, right?

Yeah. So what do you notice when someone comes in and they're apprehensive or you know, someone's talked them into coming in? What do you notice in that person in the process? We have that happen a lot. That is a very common occurrence. It probably is more so this time of year because there's a lot of first time people coming that have never done it or don't normally do this project.

And I am very, very, um, I strongly advocate openness. That is a huge part for me, that people be open to the process, open to the possibilities, and they come in and they're nervous and they're, they're kind of like, well, can you help? What do I need to do? And, and we say, well, it's DIY, but we are here with you and we will help you through it.

But we wanna see what you can create, but we won't let you leave unhappy. So we are building happiness through it and seeing them start to go from the beginning where they're like, oh, this is fun to pound this wood, and they get kind of, um. Like this is a stress reliever, and so then that, that really kind of opens it up right then because it, it seems very unreal to do something like that somewhere.

It's not like you, they don't expect to do that, I guess. It's not like going to one of those smash places where they know they're gonna do it. So it's a surprise. So that kind of opens them up to, to relaxing a little bit and then choosing the colors. They, people are a lot of apprehensive choices. They wanna see and get our opinion and so we just talk them through like what colors are in your the room?

You wanna put this? And that's, then they start thinking, okay, I can see that. Then the reveal. That is the biggest part. So it's a stencil, but so they're seeing it and they're seeing this paint all over the stencil that is kind of, kind of messy. It's kind of, you can't tell what it's gonna look like. And so they're all thinking, this is not gonna turn out well.

This is going to be a mess. And when the peel, you take the stencil and you peel it off the paper and their face, that is the, the joy right there. When they, the peel of the reveal, we call it peeling and revealing and their face that they did it, that they made something that turned out so well that they had a hard time believing.

I get a comment a lot. It is so funny. They're like, this could be in Hobby Lobby or like. That, um, that they did. So the joy, and then they start looking around and seeing other projects on the wall. They're like, well, maybe I wanna do another one. Maybe I'll bring this person. Maybe. You know, it's just, it's a growth through the whole thing.

And that is what makes it joyful to me as the owner and all of our staff that's really seeing the, the, and we also have had friendships built through, be not just our staff with the, with our customers. Customers that don't know each other, and they've come more times, they're like, well, I wanna come on this date.

Are you gonna come? And so I've seen relationships built. Oh, nice. Yes. That has been really fun to see that. What I love about creativity is it's when you tap into creativity, you give yourself the permission to color outside the lines. Exactly, because what are the lines, you know, I mean, philosophically or people, we, we, we buy into these, these constructs, right?

And so you have this, this environment where you get these customers and clients that come in and through interactive and engagement with what they're doing, you know, it starts to stimulate or open up something within them, is what I does. It really does that people will walk around and look at what other people are doing and see something and they just like, oh, and giving them the other people, the compliments of you chose a great color, or that design is really fun.

And so it does build. They're like, oh, thank you, and, and they just start talking and yeah, that has been just the most amazing part of our. Our experience for the last three years, and I have a lot of people that say to me, oh, you must have been an artist. You must have been. Um, we, I get asked if I was an art teacher a lot, and I absolutely not.

Absolutely not. I liked doing some crafty things, but I never thought I would be doing this. And now it, it wasn't in the plan. It was not in my plan to be here. So. How it, how it all happened. It turns out that it was the right thing. And I, the relationships that I've built through this has been remarkable.

And I, I've had, I've gone out to lunch with customers now, so that has been, you know, like just building that has been amazing. I have, um, I have a customer that is, um, very unsure of herself all the time. And so walking her through and seeing her grow over the time that she's been there to build confidence.

Even I feel like that, I mean that confidence can go out into the world. It doesn't have to stay in our little studio. It's like, um, what I'm hearing you say is it's, it's almost like training and conditioning and, and exercise for your, um. Your belief system. You know, your ability, your, your, your yeah, your soul.

Absolutely. Cool. So, all right, now this is where we start to get fun. So, okay, this is the business and this is how, how powerful and what it does for you today. Let's go back. So where did you grow up? I grew up, I was Minnesota for 10 years, and then Colorado has been home since I was 10 years old. I have always been in Aurora, Southeast Aurora, out by, um, the tollway Express toll.

I'm kind of by there, right? Right there. So I've always been here, went to high school here, went to college here, so everything has been in the surrounding area. So, um, married, my, met him in high school and we have been married for 38 years, so it's been, he is a native as well. Which high school did you go to?

I went to Gateway. Oh yeah. Okay. Gateway. Always the Olympians. Yes. You used to, uh, since, since we're both from Colorado, well, you're basically from Colorado, right? Yes, I am. I consider myself, I used to wrestle, uh, gateway would have a, a wrestling tournament every year. So we would go out to gateway and wrestle at your high school.

So what, where did you go to high school? At North Glen. Okay. Yeah. Back when North Glen was the. Edge of the, you know, the metro area and once you got to Northland, it was farms beyond that. Yes. Now it's all suburbs, all the way up to Fort Collins and down to Colorado Springs. Yeah. Where, where I'm at. None of this was out here.

When I went, the high schools that were in Aurora were like, we were the probably one of the farther south. Schools at that time. Rangeview was built a couple years before, but yeah, it was, yeah, it was, it's built up a lot, for sure. Wow. All right, so you went, you, you grew up here for the most part. Now, where were you?

You said you were 10 years in Minnesota. Where were you born? Like. In the cities. Twin Cities in in Twin Cities. Okay. Yeah. I've lived there, been there a few times. I actually enjoy Richfield right by the, I was very close to the Mall of America. That was not there, of course. But that is kind of, that would've been the mall that I would've hung out at as as a teenager if I had liked back when malls were a big thing.

Right, right, right. Nobody gets to the mall anymore. Yeah. I go into a mall every now and then. It's like, oh wow, this is a different world now. It is. So you went to school here, graduated high school here, then you went to school. Um, what did you study? What did you go onto school studying for? What were you I was in the medical field.

I was a nursing student, but I became a medical assistant rather than at the time to start, so I could do that while I was in school. And I moved up in, I was in an, I worked for an O-B-G-Y-N-I was in an office and she offered me a promotion. And I thought, and, and a lot of, a lot of flexibility at the time I had kids is when I went back to school.

And so I stopped the nursing program and so it's just in medical assisting. So it's, uh, it's biology. Biology degree, but I worked there, I worked in the medical field for about 20 years. Yeah. I was an EMT and I worked in the medical field for about, in the field for about 10 years in the field. I, I trained people for about eight years.

At the university? Well, yeah, at the, the co college. Yeah. So I was training EMTs for a while, but having that medical background. So I'm sure you saw a number now. You saw more in an office environment, or did you see, okay. Yes, I worked more, I worked in an office environment for the 20 years. So what was it that had, so I do shift work.

It's, what was that? I'm sorry. I didn't have to do shift work. That was really, and I didn't work on the weekends, so that was kind of the. The crux at that point with kids. I'm like, okay, you know what, I'll take it. So I became the office manager, and so I did, I was management for about 10 years. Okay. Yeah. I did a shift work for, I, I worked in a hospital.

I actually liked, worked in the hospital, and then I worked in an urgent care clinic, but it was shift work. It was 12 three twelves. Yeah, that's it. And then you'd pick up, you'd pick up other days and stuff like that. Um, but I did graveyards too, so that was always a differential. So, but that was, uh, you know, freed you up to do stuff during the day.

Sort of, it does free you up. Yes. Yeah. So what was the transition then? I mean, so here's this person who grew up in, in Colorado, um, finds her sweetheart in high school, has a family, gets an education, and then. For 20 years he was running this office. And what happened? Like what? What has you like go towards what you do now?

I went to a wedding in Texas at my cousin's and it was a gorgeous wedding, had great time with family. The day after the wedding, I was on an A TV with my nephew. He was four years old. He was on my lap. We went over something and flipped. And, um, next thing I know, I am in a helicopter being brought to, um, M oh, uh, md, not MD Anderson.

Yes, MD Anderson. That's where I went. So I had a head injury. That was, that was the, the. Change in my life that I had never expected. You know, you have a plan. We had actually planned to, when my kids were done with college, we were going to move to Hawaii. My husband and I, that was our plan. We had planned it for, we had been on the, on the, we wanted to be local for close enough.

If our kids needed us, well, they were through school, but then after that we're like, see ya. We have a life we wanna live. So that was our plan and that day changed everything in our life. I, um, I don't remember the helicopter, I don't remember the accident other, I remember right until right before it. And then I, um, in the hospital and very confused and very.

Not sure what was going on. So luckily I didn't have a brain bleed. It was just a very, it was a very severe concussion that caused life changing, a life changing moment. I did. Was not able to go back to work at a clinic, at my, at the doctor's office. I was not able to drive. I was not able to be in large groups.

I stayed home and so for, for eight years I was home. Completely. And that, well, it's been, it has now been 15 years, eight years. I didn't drive my dad, I always joke that he was, um, would drive Miss Daisy around. He was my chauffeur. He is retired and took care of all my appointments. My, um, it was lucky to have him because I was a, it was before Uber, it was before any Lyft driving.

It was any of that. So, um. It was before food deliveries. So, you know, think 15 years ago. And it's crazy to think that they didn't have that. But we didn't, we didn't have all those things. So I was, I was reliant on, on family and friends for, and my husband, my husband obviously, um, you know, he had to work, so he's gone.

So I was home and after, so after eight years of it, I started driving just a little bit. I also had a new baby grandson that I told my daughter, I said, you know, I think I can watch him a couple days a week. It, what it mostly is, is it's overstimulation is the problem that causes more of the effects in me even still can happen.

Like I still have days, I, I have a certain number of hours in a week that I have capability. That's kind of how they go by. They're like, you have like 20 hours. Is about what your, your brain can handle before you're, it's tired. So anyway, my grandson, um, I, I watched him for a couple days. Well, that's when COVID hit.

So then he's home. My daughter was laid off and they were home. And we were home. And so after that, and what's funny about COVID is I was already used to that. I was gonna say you were, you were already conditioned to it. I was conditioned completely. And so when everybody was like, I have to stay home. I can't go anywhere, I need people.

And I was like, well, you get used to it honestly, but, but I was completely okay with it because I'd been my life, it didn't bother me that I couldn't run to the store as easily or go out to dinner with friends. I just didn't do a lot of that at that point. I had to really think about it. If we went anywhere and did things so, and things were better at that point, somewhat, I could do a little more.

Um. It was more of a problem. My husband took a three month furlough and my oldest, my son, my oldest child was, he lived with us at that time. He had just moved back from Wyoming recently before that and was living with us, and he took a three month furlough. So I had these two people home with me every day.

That's new. Yes. They weren't used to being home, so that was die. That's what you had to acclimate to. Now. That was what was different. That was what was so different. So, and I, as people started working and going back to work, a friend of mine invited me to go to board and brush, and I. Was, I had been doing crafty things at home, especially through COVID.

I did, I made a lot of projects and people were not able to go to craft sales and things, so I actually went online and, and made things, and people purchased them. I put a little store up on my own and people would come and pick it up off my porch. So it kept me busy doing things and people were still able to get some personalized gifts that they wanted.

So I did that through Christmas time, during, I guess 2020. Is that, that's probably when that was, right. Um. So when she asked me to go to board and brush, I thought, why I, I do all of it at home? And she said, it's different. It's, it is different. And so I, I thought, okay, let me be open to this. And that was really where I started being more like, let's try things.

Let's see what, what happens. I fell in love with it and I asked, I thought, okay, I'm driving a little, it's not too far. And so I asked them after I'd been a couple times if they needed somebody to work there. I did that, uh, about two days a month, probably two or three, and then three months in, she decided to sell it, the owner.

Wow. So that's, I didn't want it to change. And so I just, on a whim, it wasn't even a, like I said, it was not in the plan, and I just thought. I don't want it to change. I want this to still be open to people to come. I love the creativity, I love the experience of being out, doing things with people. So my, I asked my daughter if she wanted to go into business, women, so, Hmm.

Here we are. So it's a family owned business. It's a family owned, female owned, my husband's part owner too. Well, yeah. Yeah. And her husband. He, he is just around to do the grunt work. I, I know, I know that position. He, yeah. He cuts all of our wood. Yeah, he really does. Is the grunt work. Yeah. He and gets no glory.

Makes sure you have supplies, you know? Yes. He, he's the good guy back in the shadows, right? He is, yes. Yes. So, family owned business. Now, since you bought it, tell, tell me about the development, the growth. What, what have you noticed? 'cause you've had it for three years now. I have, and we went in. We've learned a lot, and we learned that the relationship part is probably the most important part of this business.

The experience is people coming out and being together. Our growth as the relationships grow, seeing that that's more important than the project, the wood, it's really the people that come in is what has changed our life. Nice is, is seeing that. And so that, and it's really helped me to see another part of experiential life, that getting out and doing things with friends and family is, is more important to build those relations, to build those memories.

And I think about that even with my grandson. He remembers the things we do together and he'll talk about that. He doesn't remember the thing I bought him for Christmas last year. He doesn't remember exactly what, which thing, I mean, he knows he has things, but he, I don't, he doesn't know which ones he doesn't remember.

They're, it's not that important, but he remembers that we go and do something really, we do a big experience. Usually every Christmas we try to take a one day and go do something, and this year we actually took two days and we went and did the Gaylord experience, all of the stuff, stayed with him for two days and seeing him.

Light up, he's, he's eight, so he is able to do a lot more. So it's fun to do those things. And so that's really what I talk to families about when they come in is they're gonna remember you brought them here. They're gonna remember that you brought them ice skating at outside at Christmas, or that you sat down and played games with them at home last night.

They're gonna talk about that as they grow up and the time spent. So I try and talk to people about those things. When we're in classes and remind them that that's, those are the important things in life. I love that because it really is about, I mean, the experiential training that I've done for years, 'cause I actually did that even though as an EMT, I still did that.

Um, as a side business. Yes. So I've been training for almost 30 years. Oh wow. And training, training people and stuff. And it's around experiential training. That is interesting. Yes, it is. The experience that. Sticks with people. It's like a lot of people show up and they think because they know it, because it's information they have in their head.

They, the human experience is that we, we kind of think because we know it, we do it and we, we don't until you actually do it, do you get a really co really new concept of, wow, like you said, you, you, you may buy your grandson a gift and he doesn't remember the gift unless he did something. At an extreme, you know, like I got some new skis, but I went skiing with the family on a ski trip, you know, and that kind of thing.

Right, exactly. That might make them remember that we, we, yeah, we, my, my, he remembers all the things. And so my family, we really try and do that, those things. And, you know, it's really easy to get to the point where you wanna stay home through after you're done do, you're doing things, you're like, oh, it sounds good.

And you, you plan it, but then you, you don't wanna leave sometimes, but you have to push yourself to be open and to do those things to join because. You can, people can end up in a very sad place by not doing things. And I was, I went through that. I did go through a season of depression that when I was home.

Let's, uh, let's explore a little bit of that real quick if you're up for it, because, um, you do talk about the other side of adversity. Yes. So, you know, with what you just said and, and, and what I know about your, your. Discussion about the other side of adversity. Share a little bit with our listeners about that.

About how, okay, so when I was home, I was, I was angry for a while. At the beginning I was angry that my life was changed, that I had plans that were no longer gonna happen. So we didn't see that as an option because I had to stop working. So that was less of an income that we had. I mean, that was huge. So I had to change some of the things we did and I had to be reliant.

And so I was, and I was angry that I couldn't go and get my own gallon of milk, you know? I mean, it was just feeling like it was just dumb little things. If I wanted to do something and then reminded myself, I am not, I don't get to do that. And also part of it that it was, you didn't see my injuries.

Nobody saw that my brain was rattled, is the way I like to say it. It was shaken up a bit, but, and so I actually did see, I, I ended up going to a neurological psychologist, so he only sees people with brain injuries and so I worked with him. Until he retired, which was, we had to work towards that. But, uh, it was, that was about, I did that for about 12 years and then he retired just a couple years ago.

But he, we worked through being angry and that it was okay to be angry and that I had to work through that motion. But when we got through that emotion, then depression hit. So kind of like the stages of grief. Denying. I went through all those things because it was a loss that I had. It was a loss of a life.

Yeah. A loss of a life, a loss of identity, a life, a loss of identity. My daughter actually said after she was in college, my son was in, my son was in college still then too. Both of them are they? Um, my daughter said to me one day, I just want my mom back. And I said, I don't think that person. Is coming back.

It changed a little bit of my personality and so I said, we have to get to know this new person that I am. And so seeing them go through that was hard too. That they were having, they, they struggled. So that caused a me a little bit more depression. Like I was letting people down. Uh, and since you couldn't see it, I didn't have crutches.

I didn't have a wheelchair. I wasn't using, you know, I didn't have. I wasn't blind. I didn't need to, you know, nobody could see it. So some days it was easy for other people to forget and I didn't want it focused on, I mean, of course I did not want people focusing. I didn't want sympathy. I didn't want, I didn't want that, but I also needed my family to remember I might not be able to do that and might not be able to go to that.

We went, I went to. Sports events a lot. We are, we love all the Colorado teams and, um, that is something that, that was off the table being in crowds like that was not Yeah. Going to shows down at the Denver Art Center. I, uh, didn't go to those because a lot of that was because of lighting. 'cause we could get in there, I could sit and then wait till it emptied out to leave so that I wasn't in the crowd, but the lights in a lot of shows was too much.

So, so then, so I became depressed and I became somebody that just, I was home all day. I watched daytime TV because I also couldn't read a book because the pages, a lot of my problem is vis, it's not peripheral, it's more transition. So, um. As things are coming at me, I can't tell where they are. And so when there's a crowd coming, I can't see what's coming right at me.

And it it, and so that's what causes the, um, anxiety and um. Vertigo causes a lot of dizziness. So I, you know, those losses cause depression. And that's where I've lived for a long time thinking this is what my life became and it's not fair. And if I had made one split decision different, this wouldn't have happened.

And uh, so I had, I had to, I'm kind of as you share that, it sounds like, um, and I'm just sharing from what hit me just now. Yes. It's kind of like negotiating with the past. You know, it's like, I wanna negotiate because, and you know, it's, it's a game that we play with ourselves because it's not, it's not based in the present.

It's not based in our reality. So it kind of keeps that depression alive. It keeps that, that game alive. We don't, it's not a game. It doesn't feel like a game, but Exactly. But it's, it's kind of our, our head game that plays with us. It does. Like, can I just go back, you know. Changed my mind. One little thing, one hill that we went on that I didn't go, yeah, I know exactly what I did because of how the accident happened.

They can, they were able to say, um, and nobody was there. My, they, they live my cousin's property where we were at, what they were, a lot of them were down in a barn and we were just finishing up, coming back and there was a hill and is believed that I did not go straightforward and that I went to the side to try to miss the hill and that's how it flipped.

But, um, if I could have just went straight, you know, if I could have just. So, um, I had to work through that and I'm not angry anymore because it brought me to where I am. I'm not depressed anymore about it. I came to understand that the new me is who it is, and I found who real friends are because they stuck by.

And came to visit, came to drive, came to, you know, didn't ask all the time, how are you? Because that, that is really a hard thing when everybody's always. How are you? And it's that tone. Are you okay? And so you don't want that. You don't want that. Where do you get the other part? How are you, let me tell you about my experience.

That's, oh my God, no. Can we not talk about this right now? Human, human beings do that all the time. I mean, yes. You know, and I'm, I've been guilty of it. I'm sure you probably, I mean, it's like, but you know, the more you, I'll just share this, um. It may not feel like a gift, what you went through, but the skill and the awareness that you have now that you would never have had had you not gone through this.

There is a gift that people do not understand. Some people do, but a lot of people, it's a, it's an, oh, I know that. Or I, you know, it's this. I think I, I think it's so, I think I know, and it's, and it's not, it's like, it's like you went through. Some people would call a a a A Dark Night of the Soul. Oh, that's good explanation of it.

Yes. Through this process and what got you through and coming out on the other side was the fact that your persistence, your ability to hang in there, your ability to not give up, your ability to deal with. Sorry, listeners deal with the shit exactly the way it is. Right. You know, it's like, it's, it's about being real with that experience and, and learning to, I don't know.

For me, I just share this learning to embrace the light and the darkness so that the balance is there so that the opportunity is still there. Is that, is that a fair way to say it? Exactly. It is. It is because there are still days that I may not be depressed, but darkness is there because I'm not able to do something.

So, you know, you do have still a little bit of that where I feel like I'm supposed to be doing something this weekend and but my week was too busy and so I have to rest my brain and so I have to pass on something and getting to the point where I'm comfortable saying I'm not able to do that. I'm gonna have to say No.

That's a hard, you know, I, I was a go do everything person before the, before my accident. I was, I was, uh, I coached palms at a high school and had just recently stopped that. So I was a, I was at the school still even after my daughter had graduated. I continued doing that. She, I wasn't her coach, I was her the JV coach.

So she, um. But I had done that and continued doing my own team, and I loved that I was on boards, different boards of some sports boards, some uh, neighborhood activity boards. So I did a lot of things that filled a lot of time. It was always a joke with my friends and people there. If you needed something, just ask Missy because she'll know who to get you.

Like you, you need a garage person. Okay. Call Missy. She's got one. She's got I You're a connector. So many very connected. I was very connected by being very involved with my community, so I knew a lot of people and you know, and I still, I'm, and I'm actually building back up all that. Like, it's kind of a nice thing that I, I liked that, I liked being able to help and give them something that made people.

They, somebody I felt like I trusted this person, so let me share it with you. And that with good experiences of that too. So those are things that, that were hard and bring dark days to like, oh, I'm missing out on that. I'm missing out on I going to Rocky's games were huge. I mean now it's, it's a little bit not so fun for people to go there, I think.

But it's.

Oh, but it's just temporary, right? It's temporary. It's a building season. Yeah. For how long? Yeah. Right. Luckily we have nuggets in Broncos, but I'm more, I'm Ival lunch Aval, you're see, and that's the one sport I really don't. Don't get into. I love it. I, I mean, you know what the, yeah, I, I, it's amazing that I don't, and soccer, I'm not a big, I'm not a soccer.

I, baseball and soccer kind of competed. My son played baseball. Oh. So it was during soccer season. So, you know, why would somebody wanna go and kick a ball, like when you've got a bat, you can pound it. So, so that was a hard thing to miss out on. And, um. So those, and so I would encourage my family still to go to 'em and they didn't want to.

And so then that brought the feeling guilty. There's the other, the other emotion through this because they were missing out on things and they wouldn't go and I had to push them to go do things. My husband especially did not wanna go do things because he felt bad leaving, but you, like, you still need to live the life you enjoy.

You enjoy that so much? I don't want that taken away. So that, that was a, you know, the guilt along with what I changed and that my husband felt like he had to work harder, do more things for me. He actually, every single night when he leaves work, and he still does it, even though I drive, he will call every night.

He'll call on his way home. Do you need me to stop anywhere? Do you need anything? What do I need to do? And at first I, at, at times I would get, like, I would get, I would get a little irritated and that, and I shouldn't have because he was doing such a nice thing. But I was like, if I need something, I'll call you, you know, be angry.

I'm like, don't, don't coddle. I'm fine. Just I have a phone to call you. So, but now I just take it as an appreciation that he cares that much to make sure I have what I need. So I, I want to jump in here 'cause it's like, okay, you, you are. Such a gift. Thank you. Thank, thank you. And I'm not saying that as hyperbole or to pump you up or anything.

This life experience and, and it's, it, you know, it's part of the reason why I created this podcast. It's part of the reason why I do the business that I do insights for choice. Because when you, when you have real insight, when you open up to deeper insights, the choices that you make create. Power, empowerment, possibility for yourself.

It does. When you have these transitions, so you went through a closed head injury, right? Yes. It was closed head. Right. And it brought you awarenesses that you may not have had before. And I, having worked with a number of different clients in a number of different arenas, um, plus myself being. Diagnosed or labeled learning disabled in the first grade.

It was like I processed my world. I've had to process my world differently. And for the longest time, I didn't, the longest time I was a struggle. I was a victim to it. Um, but I'll tell you, I played the label, man. I worked, I've got, I was, I was a kid. I became a master manipulator. I, I, I was basically a chameleon because I would use the labels.

To my advantage, and honestly it was more to my detriment. But what I really learned and realized with what you're sharing and all this is as you're coming into this awareness with your family, with them, you know, like your husband's example of this is a, this is a sign of him sharing love. Not only, you know, also being like, I don't want to get home and have to run back out from the house again.

If I'm coming home, let's get it now. Right. Course, it's now being efficient. Right. There's that kinda stuff. There's an interesting dynamic too, 'cause you have to manage your energy and awareness. You have to manage your, your spatial engagement. Um, and what I noticed early on as, as a, a young kid, um, and it didn't make sense to me until I really did deep, deep work in my twenties and thirties, but, um, I was, I was so accustomed to taking on everybody else's energy.

And so when you talk about going into groups, I, I never knew why I was group adverse. I was, you know, if there was, um, I, I enjoyed going to parties and stuff like this, but it was like I didn't want to hang out and I was always like, here, let me move through. Let me get outta here. Let me do the, it wasn't because, and I always had the feeling, this was back in the day when in high school we could go to three, two bars.

Right. I had that too. I was the last month. Oh, I have a friend that actually got cut off. He got cut off by three days. Three days, and he, my best friend, got cut off by about a month, but yeah. Yeah, and they were like this, they, we, we, we felt sorry for him, but it was one of those things like whenever I, when walk into a three, two bar, I felt like I was constantly on guard for a, a fight.

Like I wasn't looking for a fight. But I could feel that energy and I, it didn't make the place fun. It didn't make, you know, and that's probably why I drank more than I needed to or should have. And it was like, you know, you do things to counterbalance things that you're not managing well. That's what I noticed for myself.

Right, right. So with what you've shared and why I say that you're such a gift is because as you hang in there, as you. Have grown yourself through this experience as you realize that kind of negotiating with the past, which, you know, we think we can do. But there are some reason, the reason why I wanna highlight this is there are some people that may be listening to us now who are struggling with some sort of form of depression, form of connection, form of, um, not fitting in and.

Maybe they've gone through something that has transformed their life, like what you went through. Maybe it's something they've always had in life, but they've never actually learned a new way to hold it in relationship for themselves. This is an opportunity. That's why when I, when whenever we open up to get to know someone new and what you've shared today, it's so powerful.

It's so beautiful at the same time. Sure. Is there. Trauma that occurred. Absolutely. Is it tragic? It can be. Doesn't have to be. Oftentimes when people get, what I noticed, um, is when people get stuck in sort of a pattern and that pattern really takes him to depression. Sometimes the depression is they're taking responsibility for a situation or other people's feelings.

They're not knowing how to do that for themselves. Yes. And I'm just sharing that because, um, we've touched on this today and, and, you know, we could talk for a few more hours. I mean, it's like, you know, bring, bring out the tea, bring out the coffee. We could sit here and have a great discussion. Right. Have a conversation day.

Yep. But it's, it's the aspect of. I just wanna acknowledge you, acknowledge your family, acknowledge everybody who participated in at times, maybe it wasn't what you wanted, it wasn't what you liked, it wasn't, it didn't feel good, but you still valued yourself enough to keep looking for possibility and moving forward, and that that is a gift not only you give yourself, but it is a gift that your story helps others see in themselves.

You know, and I talk about that a little bit, that everybody's, everybody's story doesn't have to be a huge trauma. It can be somebody could have just retired from a job and lost that. You lose their identity during those times. A postpartum parent, mother that doesn't know how to reach out for help, um, you move to a new city and are excited about it, but you don't know where to start.

There's so many things that does not have to be a big aha moment. Absolutely. That is that pe, everybody's going through things and nobody needs to be discounted by what their thing is. But I really encourage being open to, to the experiences, to join, to make an attempt even when it's difficult. And I'm gonna add exactly to what you just said, 'cause I love what you just said.

Nobody needs to, to have to be obligated to do any of this. The other thing too, is also realize nobody needs to be coddled. The people who are going through struggles, if they're coming from a powerless position, taking their responsibility doesn't help them get powerful. It actually helps weaken them.

And so when you can honor the strength that someone, sometimes the pain and the struggle. The gift. And sometimes we don't see that. We don't know that. And I've shared this in the past, I think I even shared it in my book a little bit, where, um, you know, I don't know any parent who, you know, as they protect their child, as they want to help their child grow stronger in their life.

They don't want their child children to struggle. They don't want their children to be in painful situations. Sometimes it's those struggles that we help guide them through, right? That makes them stronger. But if you take away the struggle, if you take away the situation, you have just stolen one of their lessons that it may take decades before they come back around and have to learn it again.

I agree. Like I don't believe that parents wanna steal their children's lessons, but I'll say this. I've met so many parents who have done it on a daily basis. Absolutely. And it is, it is not from, at least the ones that I've crossed paths, it wasn't from ill intent, it was from good intentions, but they didn't realize the impact it was having on the child.

And we're just, we're delving into this, but this is the kind of stuff that, you know, this is about what powerful and unpolished is about. It's about. Here's this divine soul, Missy is starts this family business, buys this family business is, is, is guided by whatever purpose within herself and outside of herself.

She was guided through this whole experience, um, and she's created this business that impacts her customers, impacts her clients, and for individuals who are looking for something new, are looking for, uh. Some social stimulation, some creative outlet, maybe some, um, uh, I'm gonna say this, um, I don't mean it medically per se, but, um, a medical intervention, which is like art has been known as a divine skill for helping people who were struggling medically, you know, with, with some depression, with some emotional struggles.

To be in a space where, where Missy has has held her business and it's in Parker, Colorado and it's called Board and Brush. You can go on to board and brush.com, check it out, and um, and it's a franchise. If you live somewhere else, there might be another one near you. I, I will encourage that as well. Not just to my studio, but there are some in almost every state.

Wow, that's awesome. Two 40, I think. I think 240 ish is about where we're at, at studio numbers. So yes, I will tell you that for those, you know, Missy's, Missy's sharing the love. So if you're, if you're in another state listening to this, 'cause we do have people listening from around the, around the planet actually.

Had a great interview with a gentleman from, uh, Australia, and that was awesome. Nice. So, um, but this is, if you're in Colorado, if you're close to the, the between Colorado Springs and, and Denver, or if you wanna drive down from Fort Collins, whatever you wanna do, um, I know that there's a number of different places out there, but the, the reason why I promote Missy is this.

She has just this natural gift of helping others to embrace themselves. And that's a gift that we give ourselves by allowing others to help us. So she has, um, I just wanna thank you, Missy. Thank you for, for joining us. Yeah. So it was very, very enjoyable to have the discussion. I loved it. Wonderful, wonderful.

Um, I send you out. I, I wish you a Merry Christmas. Happy holidays, happy New Year. Uh, we just finished Hanukkah, happy Hanukkah, um, to any and all our of our listeners. We wish you all the best as you move forward. We hope that what you've heard today is not only inspiring on some levels, but some deeper levels for you.

Is there anything else you'd like to share or Missy. I think I would just wanna touch for a second on what you said, that each person has to make their own decision, and that is when we, we talked, when I saw talk about the joining and openness in the Christmas season, I talked about joy joining open and yourself.

You get to make the decision to stay in old hurts, or you get to make the decision to to move forward. Or to try things. And so I just, in this season, I, I just ask people to, to make some decisions, to push yourself out into the, to experience life, to experience people, and to make the decision to let go of some of those old, old hurts.

Nice, nice. Thank you for. For wrapping us up on with that statement. For everyone listening out there, we thank you very much for, for following listening to us. Um, if this is something you found useful, please share with a friend. Give us a, like, give us a review. Um, also, uh, in the new year, we're going to be planning on dropping more consistent, uh, episodes as well, so you'll hear more powerful and unpolished.

Whether you like it or not, but it's gonna be coming your way and, uh, we wish you all the best in 2026. Take care.